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1 :我的优点是:我很帅;但是我的缺点是:我帅的不明显。My advantage is that I am : L5 p8 d6 G( @* E
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handsome, but my disadvantage is that the handsomeness is not so
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& t. |9 u; I) O+ lobvious.
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:谈钱不伤感情,谈感情最他妈伤钱。It does not hurt feelings, when it comes to money, but it
y. [1 t, n, p3 r3 eindeed
8 s6 G7 `- w; C i4 ^' Qdamn cost money when it comes to feelings.
7 U- K( V# _6 `, j3 U3 X! K. j; n7 Z 3 :我诅咒你一辈子买方便面没有调料包。I curse your buying
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" n) w4 d9 |1 ?7 ?4 d0 M& \noodles without getting flavoring bags.1 Q1 @9 n" Y9 a. Z5 G- z; j* P
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4 :会计说:“你晚点来领工资吧,我这没零钱。”The accountant said : , U9 B; f6 U- F0 W+ A! f" r/ Z0 I
“Could
4 R+ v% ~3 l# O4 P# _! myou please come for your earnings later, because I have no change 9 M% |- y+ E8 M0 P* b( [2 e
here?”
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5 :虽然你身上喷了古龙水,但我还是能隐约闻到一股人渣味儿。Although you 8 } M/ l( M" S- d
7 p& L2 Y, l6 g) D5 swear some cologne, I can still vaguely smell a scummy whiff out of 0 P" J) I8 Y/ L
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you.2 `) Y: R: h% I
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:有一次我上街,一群女孩把我拦住,她们说我帅,我不承认,她们就打我,还说我虚伪。When I went shopping one day, a group of
8 b- l5 v9 S' K9 Ugirls stopped me,
9 @! t* F7 `* j: [0 t! y( D, ~saying that I was handsome .But I denied it, and then they " p5 s& J. _/ ? ^" i
hit me and said I am ( o$ d+ g7 v# E X0 d5 T
hypocritical.& R# m: X0 T' J% ~
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7 :冲杯三鹿给党喝。Pour boiling water into a cup
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milk powder, and give it to the political party. , ?$ s5 ]! v, f7 D; n0 a! J) d6 X
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2 G" L7 {3 j/ S6 N L8 :史上最神秘的部门:有关部门。The most mysterious department in the
$ }7 K3 j1 [8 h5 d' q$ G+ F2 Zhistory is the department " m, G) z+ M: Y) V2 t, `
concerned.4 A j6 L$ ^# @: t
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9 :我这辈子只有两件事不会:这也不会,那也不会。There are two 1 c Z6 M: F( a
things that I * @8 t2 l7 O6 J) H
could not do in my life –I could not do this and I could not do 4 X9 B9 H' I9 W' e) Z8 t4 i
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that.
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3 A, @; h1 i( \; O 10:人家有的是背景,而我有的是背影。The others have their background,
* }% V2 O, K, z; `& E) j. Kwhile what I have is the sight
. y D; b c8 p: X5 m% t2 _of my back.
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11:别把虾米不当海鲜. Never treat a F+ ^! B$ G) K% {2 y9 G
dried shrimp not as
! K9 j$ {" d, g( |: x4 fseafood.
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3 B7 I8 l/ B0 r! ?8 ]# o" a/ @ 12:我是天使,回不去天堂是因为体重的原因。I am an angel, and the reason why I 0 O C( Y) K& n
can not go back to heaven is 0 l$ @5 N4 U8 p
the problem of my weight.
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13:骗子太多,傻子明显不够用了。Since there are so many 7 C6 C# L) z1 [, ]
deceivers, " e5 I% F6 N7 v! P( |
it is very obvious that idiots are not enough.
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14:你的手机比话费还便宜。Your phone
% N3 }% v1 E& z1 @6 ?9 F6 j; Nis much cheaper
9 \2 j M5 F: l6 X$ c' Q7 l: @5 L* hthan the phone words fee.8 @3 d; o1 C* P
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15:不怕偷儿带工具,就怕偷儿懂科技!We
6 y* d0 b/ ~. T' k' y' p7 Snever be afraid that % v c1 m" }& p$ n8 u1 v, v7 ^2 q7 n
thieves carry their tools, but afraid they know some ; k' N8 I/ v4 {/ B: h) `
kind of
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